Monday, July 23, 2012

I Want That Job #4

As everyone knows, I love the Olympics.  I can't get enough of it.  I watched the prelims.  I will watch every minute.  I'm excited every time I scroll through the channel menu and see two empty grey slots where the Olympics will be listed.  It's Uh-MAZE-ing.

I want to be an Olympic Race Walker.  I'm really good at walking.  I can't run for shit, but walking?  Yes I can.  Eddie and I were on the treadmill the other day and he said he was running at 3.5 and then 4 mph.  I was like, Really? I walk at that speed.  So when I went on, I did my power walking and then turned down the incline and turned up the speed and there I was, walking really really quickly.

I am a fast walker.  I have really short legs, but I walk really fast.  Sure people with longer legs have to take less strides to go further and in the overall scheme of things, I probably use more energy and would conk out sooner and would not win anything, but still, I am good at walking and maybe I can finally be a real athlete and possibly be in the Olympics if maybe the entire race walking team got food poisoning and so did every other race walker in America.  I would so totally fill in.

While I know "Olympic Athlete" isn't necessarily a "job," it is something that is respectable and think of all the commercial deals I'd get--walking sneakers, walkers, etc.  The sky's the limit.

And maybe I would be able to make a video like this with a neon outfit.  I really have no idea what it's about, but still, it, too, is Uh-MAZE-ing.

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