Thursday, November 10, 2011

Move Over Rover

I have a problem with this Range Rover commercial.

These two trucks arrive in Times Square, unloaded from a huge semi. They stay in the middle of Times Square. People ooh and ahh over them. Then at nightfall, they drive out of Times Square, one after the other, as people crowd up on the corners of the sidewalks to let them by.

Um, no.

1. No one in Times Square cares about two shiny trucks unless you are giving them away for free. Times Square is filled with blinking things, shiny things, glittery things, funny things, odd things. No one cares about a truck they can see on any street in any city.

2. Let's pretent they do attract attention and people fawn all over them. The trucks would not look as shiny and new as they did when they arrived. They would be covered in fingerprints, breathmarks, oil from nosy noses, and mystery matter ranging from possible fro-yo to possible hot dog water.

3. No vehicle can make a turn from one city street to another while pedestrians calmly wait on the sidewalks. No vehicle can part the Red Sea of Manhattan Walkers. Instead, these cars would be stuck between huge mobs of people crossing against the light as well as cars going in the cross direction who are illegally blocking the box or who get stuck behind busses that can't move because more people are walking in front of them. Not even Range Rovers can do that.

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